Friday, January 6, 2012

Day 0: Prep Time

So it's Sunday January 1, 2012...I start my "Adventure Boot Camp" tomorrow.  But first, I need to go to the grocery store and prepare.

Grocery List:
Protein Powder
Healthy Food

Ok, that's broad.

Since I needed a giant tub of protein powder I went to Walmart...yes....Walmart.  And not even just Walmart...Anaheim Walmart.  It was either that or Costco.

First thing I see when I walk in is the produce, ok, this won't be so bad...it's all right here, I won't be here long.  I grab some strawberries, bell peppers, spinach, carrots, celery and maybe some stuff I'm forgetting.  I call Jason and tell him some of my dinner ideas like a stir-fry.  He thinks that'll be a great idea and says to get some water chestnuts and baby corn for the stir-fry...I ask him what section I can find that in and he says the "Asian" section.  I don't think Walmart is that cultured and I don't think they have an "Asian" section.

I proceed to find everything canned but water chestnuts and baby corn and no Asian section.  So, of course, I end up wandering and picking up other things for my basket.  Jason keeps giving me obscure things to get at Walmart...WTF?!  Walmart is not organized like most places...you want me to find La Victoria taco sauce?!

Jason also asks for carne asada.  I scoped out the meat for another 10 minutes with no carne in sight.  I finally decide to ask one of the...employees (boy I edited myself there) in the canned food section.  The look on her face when I asked for carne asada was pure confusion....she was mexican so I'm not sure what that was about.  She says she's not sure and asks this older white lady who looks like she's smoked a pack a day for the last 20 years, and probably wears patchouli.  She said, "Oh yes that's over here..." and she speed walks confidently passed all the 150 other customers down the aisle to the meat section...HELLO!!! I have a cart here lady!!!!  She looked where I had looked and, no carne.  She said, wait here.  And went and found a younger mexican dude to ask about carne asada.....he looks in the meat section...hoping, I'm sure, that it has appeared..nope.  He tells me, "I think I saw some in back" and then he looks at me blankly, "Ok..?"  I said.  "Would you like me to get it?" he asks No you moron, I just went through 3 different people 2 of which looked all up and down the meat section like I did for 10 minutes and I still don't have carne asada "Could you please?  That would be great..I really appreciate your help"  He walks off and returns a couple minutes later with some carne asada.  I thanked him..he said nothing...did he not hear me?  "Thanks so much again, I appreciate it"...did he still not hear me?
Asshole. 

Alas, I find the water chestnuts and baby corn in a tiiiiiny little section miles from the canned food.  It was the "ethnic" food section I'm guessing as there were some asian bowl things, some indian simmer sauces and some (in my opinion) out of place water chestnuts and baby corn.

I was so busy looking for the shit I need so I could get out ASAP that I was unable to enjoy the people at Walmart...you know what I mean...you've seen the emails.  I started to feel panic-ey and ready to GET OUT when the screaming children started...and that little brat (I'm pretty sure I may have said that aloud) who wanted to play bumper carts with my cart while his mom wasn't looking...or maybe she was and she's just so overwhelmed with her little darling that she just lets him do what he wants....

I got my protein powder and got the hell out of there, telling Jason we'd have to go to a real grocery store to finish up some of our dinners...I should be good on healthy food for the week...enough to make 5-6 meals a day for the next 5 days...

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